dating

This Valentine, question yourself!

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Valentine’s day, and I felt I should stick something interesting and value adding on my blog wall! I am not much of a romantic myself, and as most of my readers must be knowing, I am still single! LOL! :D(I am maintaining a blog on relationships and focusing on love relationships). Well, I don’t exactly feel less confident about getting into a relationship! I just have too many criterion points to be cleared, before someone can completely take my heart away from me! I love my heart and believe that it’s singular status induces the necessity to place it in safe hands. I cannot bear it to be broken and degenerated! Staying single would be a more viable option than to get along with someone who thinks your heart to be a petty thing to play with! Here, I would love to let my readers know what my rules and questions are and get genuine feedback of whether I think right or crap!

 

 

  • Does my partner always want to fondle me? – A very important question, which many of us tend to overlook, basically because we are toe over head in love! There is absolutely no questioning about the fact that a brush of skin, a hug and an occasional french kiss are absolutely unavoidable when you are sitting beside the most adored person in your life! But getting hooked on every time you meet up, is like fussing for a chocolate every time you go to a confectionery! It is addiction more than love! Stay away.

 

  • Do I really feel interested in what he talks? – Many of my female readers would agree to this. Having a relationship  means sharing interests and friendship above all. These are the two things that can bind people for life. If he bores you with his talk(which might seem interesting to him), think twice over your relationship. Do you have the capacity to develop interest in your partner’s interest?
  • Do we trust each other completely? – Trust does not leave room for questions and if there are questions, the feeling that you trust is nothing more than your hypocrisy! Make yourself clear with this emotion. Love does not allow you to feel doubtful and obsessive about your partner! It allows a lot of space, trust and belief.

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Tips from a girl on how to become the perfect man in a girl’s life

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Girls love to peep at guys! Just be worth it!
Girls love to peep at guys! Just be worth it!

I recently came across a post, wherein, the author had penned down about what the expectations of a man are from his girlfriend, to make her look proper and perfect to him. When I went through it, this idea of writing about ‘what women want in their men’, came to me. I have written a related thing earlier too, mentioning what women want in a relationship. Well, I must say, both these are way different. Let’s take a look at what according to me, do women want from their boyfriends and husbands, so that they can be considered perfect!

Click here for a video about what women want men to be like. But ladies, beware! Here, it is a guy speaking about a girl’s expectations!

Here’s my list of the do’s and don’ts for guys to keep a perfect picture of their own selves in front of their girls.

Do keep yourself well dressed – decent enough, for other females to catch an eye of you with your girlfriend and say, ‘wow! lucky girl! Wish that guy could be mine!’ . Yes, that’s true! Girls tend to enjoy envy. We love it when other girls see us walking the streets with our men and just keep staring! ‘BUT‘, you are not allowed to give a damn to all those girls staring at you! 

Do listen to her carefully even when you think she is spitting off the worst of crap, or when you think you could have better things to do! Ideally, you should not feel any of the above 2, if you are genuinely interested in your girl. But for girls, listening and submitting, atleast in public, means respect. In private, i don’t think you would have much of an option left! 😉

Do show responsibility and take the lead, yet being chivalrous! I know this is difficult to do! I shall site an example. When  I go out with my boyfriend for a date, I would expect him to ask me where I want to go. Ritualistically, I would be polite enough to choose 4-5 places and then ask him to take me where he feels best. It is then his responsibility to decide. Had he not asked me first, even though finally he was the one to choose from, I would have felt insulted! Complicated, isn’t it? But that is exactly how girls are! This was just a small example. It applies to larger things in life – family, finances, home, career decisions; everything included!

Do make it a point to tell everything to your girl! Be transparent, no secrets please! Remember, we like to hear the stories of our men as much as we want ours’ to be heard! Everything, just everything, that you feel will help walk that short distance between hearts, is to be told! Too much of a feminine statement to make, but that is it!

Make her feel proud of you!
Make her feel proud of you!

Don’t be extra sensitive! You might have heard many times, the funda of women wanting men to be sensitive! Yes, we love sensitive men, men who have the sense to understand how sensitive we are, not more than that. We cry, we expect our men to understand why we are crying, listen to us and pacify us! We don’t want guys to cry louder because they cannot bear us crying! Don’t flinch at petty things! Ultimately, your girl knows you are a man and wants you to behave like one!

Don’t nag at your girl and try to surround her all the while. We women love freedom as much as you men do! So please allow that small breathing space! Nagging and surrounding are things that even we have given up to a great extent! Please don’t pick up that forbidden habit from us!

Don’t shirk your career responsibilities in the process of giving time to your girl-friends! No, we don’t like it. What we hate, is a workaholic freak, freaking around with work related excuses whenever an important date goes missing from mind. But women love men who love their work, are ambitious about their goals and are dead serious about achieving them. Such an attitude, gives women a sense of personal and social security.

Don’t underestimate the importance of surprises. I have heard many males comment, ‘Honey, I came back early from my trip! Is that not a surprise by itself?’ Well, the answer is, ‘No, it is not a surprise at all! You were supposed to come back and get something that would just make me jump at you and hug you!’. Don’t dare ignore the importance of surprises in the life of a girl! Big, small does not matter! We have been brought up with fairy tales and always expect fantastic things happening surprisingly in our lives!

I conclude with this image, I dug out from somewhere! 🙂

The perfect man
The perfect man

Do you feel that girl will take your lover away?

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This is a familiar feeling which people in love often feel for each other. Some even start believing that the partner is cheating. I would name it a complex, a love inferiority complex. When we are in love, we tend to forget the world, completely forget it. And then all of a sudden, one day, we start doubting our relationship. I have gone through an exactly the same feeling and hence, I am sharing it. We tend to get more conscious about our beauty and try to flatter our partner in some way or the other. This applies for both the girl and the guy!

And believe me, it is not wrong to feel like that until a certain point! But after that, it becomes more of a bondage. When you start feeling jealous of any other beautiful girl, and your eyeball stick to your boy’s, when he is surrounded by girls, you are falling prey to this complex! We all want to look good and be good in front of the person we love, but when this want develops into a feeling that my man must look at my beauty and praise me, no one else, you are inviting potential destruction in your relationship. Trust is an important factor in any relationship, more so, when your are in a budding love relation! Don’t let doubt creep in between your relationship.

Many people, inclusive of men and women, tend to expect their partners to explain each and every action. I never understand why it is so? There is a saying, ‘never explain, the person who loves you will not need it and the person who does not love you, will not believe your explanation’. Then why do we expect explanation from the person we love most? Think about it.

Being vigilant is good. We all should be and somehow it consoles us that our relationship is not in danger. But nagging is  something that is not welcome. Never display your love in the way of excessive possessiveness. It is actually a display of your inferiority feeling! Be confident of yourself, your partner and most importantly, trust your love! Rest, let things take care of themselves!

How do I know if I am in love

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Almost all of us claim to have fallen in love at some point of time or the other. And we go all topsy-turvy, explaining how it all went. For many, this love relationship might have been strong enough to fructify into a life-long knot, for others it might have just been a beautiful, but short journey. Believe me, true love fights its way to a successful harmony for life. What then was the feeling which just faded away with time?

Many of you would debate, saying that it could just not be taken further due to family disturbances and social pressures. Bullshit! Remember, there are people who have given up everything to save their love. We tend to part off from our partners, when we ourselves, in some corner of our heart, believe that our partner is just somehow not the one!

Why did we love them at the first place at all? The explanation is this – There is an almost indistinct line between liking dearly and loving. I like to be in his company, I just feel comfortable with him, time does not have its count when we are together, we can share dreams, I am just used to him and we are just the most wonderful people together! Are you familiar with these feelings? Well the, you have got a great friend for yourself. But don’t mistake your feelings to be those tender butterflies of love! Many of us are just in hurry to fall in love and we pick up the wrong signals. And if you take these signals too seriously, mind it, you are inviting disaster for lifetime! Such relationships break down under the pressures of life!

The signs of love are somewhat different. ‘I feel responsible to him, I can’t see him worried, we fight hundreds of times, but end up hugging each other, I don’t understand, i can’t remember his faults, I give a fuck to everyone, as long as he is with me, I don’t need anyone else, I am afraid I do something that hurts him, Oh! I just love him!’ Are these the things that you have felt? Well then yes, you are definitely in love! Don’t let this guy walk out! Catch hold of him, get married and have children! This is your man!